by
Ute Carson
“It fits.” She pounded the left heel of her
travel-weary brown shoes. In its hollow my grandmother had just buried a
diamond-in-the-rough. A few days before, sitting on the steps of their
ramshackle cottage near the diamond fields of the Namib Desert where my
grandfather was an overseer, she had spotted an object in the sand. The African
sun had reflected off its glittering surface.
British freighters, anchored in the bay off
Lüderitz, were ready to transport German settlers back home following the English
takeover of South West Africa in 1919. The diamond mine workers had already
been evacuated.
Back
in her native Germany my grandmother stored the shoes among other valuables in
her closet. “You never know when we might need it,” she told my mother.
A war
later, fleeing invading Russian troops, my grandmother trekked westward. She
wore her trusty worn African shoes.
In the
icy winter of 1946 I contracted diphtheria. Although I lived in a cocoon of
familial love, infected children were forcibly quarantined in a provisional
hospital by American authorities. “Have a heart,” my distraught mother pleaded,
“we have never been apart.” She was summarily ushered out.
I was
delirious and barely aware of what was going on. I vaguely recall crying “Mutti”
during nights of feverish demon-dreams as children around me died in droves.
Once I threw my arms around a nurse, thinking she was my mother. Medicines were
scarce and penicillin was available only on the black market. There was little
hope for me.
My
grandmother made contact with a street-smart volunteer in the hospital’s
storage room where CARE packages containing powdered milk and instant soup
arrived from abroad.
That night she pried off the left heel of
her African shoes, lifted the diamond out and spit-polished it with her
handkerchief. “Your time has come,” she whispered to it and then cloaked
herself in a shabby gray coat. Under cover of darkness she descended into the
underworld of our city where smugglers eagerly exchanged the precious stone for
the new wonder drug. “Just in time,” sighed the doctor at the children’s ward.
I soon recovered.
I was
left with fear of separation, a damaged heart valve, and an amazing story. My
grandmother had to recount her adventure again and again. It was the ending
that I envisioned with vivid imagination.
“After being led through tunnels to a dimly
lit shed, a bespectacled man examined the diamond under a magnifying glass and
exclaimed: It’s real! He then reached up to a shelf behind him and pulled down
a box with black lettering: PENICILLIN. He dismissed me abruptly, urging me to
go quickly before we were found out.” My grandmother assured me that she had
not been frightened until that moment. “But then I realized,” she confessed,
“that I might be followed and robbed.” She hurried away, clutching the box of
tablets to her chest, then stuffing them into her undergarments.
“But where?” I asked with childish
curiosity. “Close to my heart,” she murmured.
A writer from youth, German-born Ute Carson’s first story was published
in 1977. Her story “The Fall” won the Grand Prize for Prose and was published
in the anthology A Walk through My Garden.
Her novel Colt Tailing was published
in 2004 and was a finalist for the Peter Taylor Book Award Prize for the Novel
and was followed by her second novel In
Transit in 2008. Her poems have appeared in numerous journals and magazines
here and abroad and Carson’s poetry was featured on the televised Spoken Word Showcase 2009, 2010 and 2011
Channel Austin, TX. Her poetry collection Just
a Few Feathers was published in 2011 and her chapbook Folding Washing in 2013. Her
poem “A Tangled Nest of Moments” won second place in the Eleventh International
Poetry Competition 2012. An advanced Certified Clinical hypnotist, Ute Carson
resides in Austin, TX with her husband. They have three daughters, six
grandchildren, a horse and a number of cats.
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